Have you seen your God?

May 18, 2018

I like to think of myself as an atheist. It is not easy though, being from a deeply religious family. To me, the idea of God and the stories that go with it have always appeared what Yuval Harari terms as “common myths”. God, to me, seems too mystical and idealistic to be true. Well, I can go on and on (ranting :P) about my feelings on the concept of a deity. That is not the point I am trying to make though.

Today, it was different.
You know the kind of moment when everything just changes, and you know that it is for the best. The kind of moment that words can never do justice to. The moment that was just a dream until that very second.

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There was lightning.
There was roar.
There was jubilation.
There were tears.
There was euphoria.
There were goosebumps.
There was just enough of everything to make that moment a forever.

You know, the enormous elation and satisfaction that people experience when they complete a pilgrimage, I get that now! मैं धन्य हो गया !

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Have you seen your God yet? Because I just witnessed mine.

—–

PS: I got to fulfil my lifelong dream of watching MSD play live. The welcome he received when he came out to bat was nothing short of phenomenal. It was one of the most beautiful moments of my life ❤

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You want me to talk?

You want me to talk?

Ever since I was a toddler, I was taught to listen. Listen to mom, listen to papa. Listen to relatives and society. Listen to friends.

Listening to everyone I forgot how to talk, how to express my feelings. I forgot what it means to open up, what it means to pour my heart out.

Perhaps that is why I always listen to your stories, trying to find a piece of me in them. Perhaps that is why I love quotes, looking for words to describe what is inside me

You want me to talk, when all I do is to listen ?

The RatTrap : Wrath of the Rat

Disclaimer: The story is entirely based on true events. Parts of it may Rattle you.

It’s a warm summer evening in office. Deadlines hanging around my neck. The pressure is immense.

Come in existential crisis. I am questioning my life decisions. Why am I doing this? Do I really need to work so hard? I could have just enjoyed my college vacations. How hard would it would it be to just walk away from all of this right now?

Ummmm……well. It’s surely time. Time for the walk. The walk to the coffee machine. Maybe some harmless caffeine will set my thoughts straight. Maybe some harmless caffeine will give me the much-needed reality check.

Fate though had other plans. Who knew that my reality cheque was soon going to bounce!

Before we move on, time for some flashback. Remember the Sanskrit shloka that essentially said that you learn a quarter by reading, a quarter from your teacher, a quarter from your peers and most importantly you learn a quarter only with time and experience. Pretty deep, right? And do you remember the story of the rattrap peddler who had this philosophy that “The world with all its luxuries…… is a rattrap”? A pretty amusing analogy. I could never really derive much sense out of it though. I guess a quarter of this analogy was still left to be understood.

Back to voyage-de-caffeine. Cup in my hand and I press the button on the coffee machine. The brown thing is served to me. Routine stuff, right? Only the brown thing is a Rat. A freaking living rat! Turns out that the machine and the rat had been together for some time now. In a symbiotic relationship. They had done a great job in keeping it private until our paths crossed.

My reaction? I think I was Rattled. And no, I didn’t have flashbacks of me gulping down cups and cups of coffee all these days. I didn’t feel like vomiting the whole day either. My memory seems hazy. Afterall, it was a moment of profound realizations. You know the kind of moment when it really hits you. Suddenly somehow all of it made sense. All it took was the Wrath of the Rat to awaken me to this simple truth. The world is indeed a Rattrap. It lures us in the rat-race, promises us all the comforts and we keep falling deeper into the Rat hole. It makes us sin and also makes us atone for them.

Even though the incident still plagues my mind (pun is always intended!), it definitely made me more Rational. How do I feel at the end of it?

LibeRATed

Letter From A Hopeless Romantic


Hi You

You have always loved to play hide and seek, haven’t you? You seem to pretty good at it. Seeking, was never my cup of tea. I give up now! I think the time has come for your “dhappa”. I wouldn’t mind it at all. In fact, I’d secretly love it.

You are dying of laughter as you try to teach me to dance. I with a sheepish grin fail terribly to match your steps. It’s not my fault though! How so you expect me to concentrate while you giggle incessantly.

We discuss how modern love is not love. I see us doing everything old-school. I see us having intelligent conversations. You always manage to keep the conversation going despite my inability to do so.

And booookssss! I don’t usually lend books, but for you, I’ll make an exception. We’ll collect books together! I’ll try to catch your literary references and will try shoot some your way too. Have you read The Perks of Being A Wallflower? It’s my favorite book! Don’t worry if you have seen the movie already. The best part is that the movie is directed by the author himself.

You laugh not at my jokes, but at how hard I try to crack them. I will teach you to appreciate puns, don’t worry. You’ll see how it is the most beautiful thing in the entire world.

I am yet to figure out whether you are gonna be a tea or coffee person. I’ll make you like tea, that’s for sure.

I know about all that talk of self-love and you-don’t-need-anyone-else, but without you there, the world somehow seems a very lonely place to be.

We haven’t probably even met (have we?) and I have already burdened you with so many expectations, haven’t I? You know how much I romanticize things. I know you’ll be just perfect (See? another expectation!).

Or maybe you are nothing as I have imagined. All I know is that you’ll be worth all the wait.

Only Yours

Quote of the Day #11

She just smiled, said that she loved books more than anything, and started telling him excitedly what each of the ones in her lap was about. And Ove realised that he wanted to hear her talking about the things she loved for the rest of his life.

Ove had never been asked how he lived before he met her. But if anyone had asked him, he would have answered that he didn’t.

-Fredrik Backman, A Man Called Ove

Lets give people a chance!

Why is it that people, friends, partners fall apart?

Why is that people who ‘knew’ one another inside-out suddenly become strangers?

Is it because we seem to ‘understand’ them so well that we don’t make efforts to understand them anymore?

Why is it that our benefit-of-doubt never seems to favour the ones we love?

Why is it the easiest to pass sweeping judgements about people we care about?

Maybe for once, lets give people a chance.

See? Easy!

All I had to do was get out of the apartment for a couple hours so Uncle Marshall could propose to Aunt Lily, go to the bar, meet your Aunt Robin, convince your Aunt Robin to fall in love with me, break up with your Aunt Robin, go on the rebound, go get a rebound tattoo, go get the rebound tattoo removed, meet Stella, convince Stella to fall in love with me, get engaged, get left at the altar, get fired, get beat up by a goat, get a job as a professor, teach the wrong class, date the wrong girl, date the wrong girl again, date the wrong girl a few times, actually, let Uncle Barney fall in love with Aunt Robin, let Aunt Robin fall in love with Uncle Barney, book the wedding band, go to their wedding, make sure their wedding actually happened, leave a little early, be in the right place at the right time, and somehow, summon the guts to do the stupidest, most impossible thing in the world: Walk up to that beautiful girl standing under the yellow umbrella… and start talking.

See? Easy.